Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Cats and dogs, living together

I don' watch "reality" television. I'm not sure why, other than I have problems with there being works that don't need or use talent on them, talent like writers and directors and food cart folks. One can not overestimate the value of a good food cart person till one doesn't have one.


But as a noted philosopher said the other night via talented words in a script, "Using the word One in reference to one-self is a good way to get beat up.

But if I did watch them, I would be able to detect whether what I'm about to write is true. I believe we should have a new reality show. And you could make it really be reality. No additions. No subtractions. Just me, my wife Mary and the critters who now roam some of the area that we live in.

For example. One could have watched our moving day experiences.

First, the movers came about an hour late.Their truck wasn't big enough, so they ordered another one, with two more driversunpackers at twice the cost.

Then, they took just a tad shorter than forever. It was like watching a soccer match, or paint dry, or the Atlanta Falcons. You know, boring and tedious and lengthy and ultimately with but a degree of success (nobody died, so it was a success, right?)  They arrived yesterday at 10:49 a.m. They left, finally, f-i-n-a-l-l-y at 10:45p.m. They madeable scraps of the estimate we had been provided. Small houses have been bought for less than they eventually charged.

I went ahead to get pets acclimated and happy again. It didn't work. The cats have decided they will never, never come out again (not all bad, come to think of it). I sat for three hours with two small dogs, four terrorized cats, and, well, nothing else.

Then it really got dark. No, I mean it. Dark.Wind and  terror=-producing claps of thunder. Have I mentioned that one of the dogs is hyper-sensitive to bad weather? So, now I'm sitting there with two dogs and one of them has attached himself to my hip in sheer terror, joining the cats in thinking I'm the devil.

Then the skies opened, and flooding waters decided to join us. The water on the street collected like some sort of bowl and stayed there. My car had water up to the middle of its wheels, and then a truck tip-toed down the street, creating waves. Now, I was terrorized. I took off shoes and shirt, knowing I had no other clothes but what I had on, waded with water up to middle of my leg it seemed, and jumped into the car. Very little water had soaked into the car, which is good because the back floor board has half a garbage bag full of cat food from a rip in the plastic bag carring said food.

Back at the parsonage at Eunice, Mary and two delightful friends were tasked with wrapping it up. That meant getting Sammy, the overwrought, overweight wide load into the back of the truck. It ook all three, some yelling, a bit of screaming, some coaxing (good cop, bad cop), some pushing, a touch of pulling, some begging, and suddenly Sammy is in. On small step for dog world, one giant leap for Sammy-dom.

Long, long, long story short, God went ahead of us. He let the water drain so the truck, oh yeah, trucks, do their thing. At 10:45, with pain shooting through every part of my body, we shut down Operation Ark.

Now?

Now we open a land-fill full of boxes. We discover where we are. I start on a new "job" and life begins again.

Till the next episode is filmed, the next box of plenty is opened, the next sermon prepared. The reality show continues.

Lord, if it be your will, let the rest go easier.

This is my offering, Dear Lord. Mary and I lay it all before you. We give you our lives because it is all we have to give. May we, your servants, be up to the task you've set before us.

And may I find my socks.

3 comments:

kevin h said...

I'm sure that sounds a lot funnier than it was. Well said and well prayed!

Anonymous said...

Not funny to you I am sure but I am rolling on the floor laughing. Been there, done that. God is good and I hope you find your socks. Love you, June

sue said...

You've had the worst, now get ready for the best!