Smile a bit

      The Apostle Paul, not the easiest to get along with I suspect when he was walking the Roman Road wrote, “Each of us must please our neighbor for the good purpose of building up the neighbor.”

       Let’s think together.

       Have we done that with, well, anyone this week?

       I mean just picked them up, made them smile?

       Really?

       Let me give you five things you didn’t do that you can in the coming week that will make someone smile.

       1. Smile first

       The easiest and possibly the most effective way to get someone to smile is to smile at them first. People don’t seem to do this anymore. Now people sort of just power walk past you in the parking lot and avert their eyes when they get near you. Perhaps it is because we have so much more fear now. I don’t know. But what I do know is that if you smile at someone first they will almost always smile back and walk away feeling happier.

2. Be chivalrous

       Chivalry is a term dating back to the medieval knights and their values of honor, courtesy and good manners. It is a very simple practice where you endeavor to behave in a kind and courteous way to the people around you and especially to members of the opposite sex. A typical example would be holding the door open for someone or standing up to greet someone. Again, it is easy to do but makes people feel really good.

3. Be self deprecating

       Self deprecation is one of the best ways to make friends and make people smile. People love it when someone makes self deprecating jokes because it makes them seem less arrogant and more approachable. The best comedians are those who use this style of self deprecation to interact with the audience. My whole routine is based on self deprecation. But remember, this is supposed to make people smile, not make them feel sorry for you. For example, if you slip at a restaurant and make a big mess you might make a quick joke like “…it was like that when I got here…” instead of getting all angry and serious and trying to blame someone or something around you. People hate that.

4. Listen

       When someone is talking to you listen to them. Don’t just sit there waiting for your turn to talk. Actually listen. This is one of the best ways to make people feel good about themselves.

       The classic book How to Win Friends and Influence People talks about how important it is to be genuinely interested in people if you want them to like you. The reason this makes people like you is because it makes them feel good about themselves. The book talks about how people perceive someone as interesting if they sit there and listen to you talk. People don’t care if you arm wrestled Darth Vader on the top of the Egyptian Pyramids – they want you to listen to their stories.

5. Surprise someone

       Have you ever brought flowers home for your wife or girlfriend because it was a Wednesday? Not Valentine’s Day that fell on a Wednesday, just because it was Wednesday? Surprising someone for no particular reason other than to make the person smile is a fantastic way to brighten someone’s day.

       There you go. Five ways to make someone smile. But there’s two more things I want you to do this week.

       Pray. Long. Short. Hard. Easy. Just pray.

       Look in the mirror. Smile at yourself. Great things come when you pray and you smile.

       I’m working on it.